3. The Beauty of Hitting Rock-Bottom

I remember sitting in the first group of my first rehab, fresh off a BRUTAL seven-day detox, and some other patients kept making references to “rock-bottom.”  At the time, I didn’t think much of it.  As I spent more time in that rehab, I learned that “rock-bottom” is a concept used to refer to an addicts’ lowest point in their addiction. It is often a crisis event that leads an addict to realize that they have lost control over their drug or alcohol use.  It’s a point so low, a pain so deep, that the addict finally becomes willing to do the work to get sober and recover from their addiction(s).  Hitting rock-bottom is unique to the addict, meaning one addict’s rock-bottom may look far different from another’s.

As I lay in bed later that night in rehab, I was so sure that I had finally hit my rock-bottom and that it was all going to be uphill from that moment on.  Boy was I wrong.  I hadn’t even begun to scratch the surface of what hitting rock-bottom was going to entail.  Like so many other addicts, I possess this unique ability of locating “trap-doors” in my rock-bottom by continuing to use alcohol and drugs.  As an addict, I “specialize” in finding new ways and means of inflicting pain (physical and/or emotional) and suffering upon myself.

An addict hitting rock-bottom is often a very dark and/or painful experience for everyone involved.  Remember from earlier that we consider rock-bottom to be an “absolute low-point of one’s addiction.”  Now, while rock-bottom may initially be perceived as this dark and/or painful experience, there may come a point in time where we begin viewing this same exact event of hitting rock-bottom as something that is also, ironically, very beautiful; an addict beginning their journey of recovery.

I know, it’s a lot to unpack at once, but try and stay with me....

Rock-bottom is the point in an addict’s addiction where the pain (physical and/or emotional) becomes so unbearable that it sparks a positive change to occur, that being newfound sobriety.  So, what we initially considered to be the very darkest, most ugly time for an addict may eventually be viewed as something truly beautiful being that it helped save the addict from the ultimate rock-bottom… DEATH. 

I want to conclude this week’s column with a quote from J.K. Rowling, the New York Times best-selling author of the Harry Potter book series.  She was recounting hitting a rock-bottom of her own when she so perfectly captured the irony in the beauty of hitting rock-bottom.  She said, “and so, rock-bottom became the solid foundation on which I re-built my life.”  

And remember, if you’re struggling, or know someone who is struggling, please don’t lose hope.  If that had happened to me, I wouldn’t be able to spread awareness today.