55. A Journey of Vulnerability, Connection, & Transformation
People often inquire about my choice to divulge the intimate details of my former substance abuse and criminal history in this weekly column. Some view it as a daring venture with a high-risk factor, and perhaps, they're right. Frequently, I'm met with questioning looks and asked, "Why do you disclose so much about your past?" Doubts linger: "What if you pursue a job, and potential employers stumble upon all these revelations?" The truth is that delving into my criminal record reveals only a fraction of my story, offering a limited perspective. The safeguard of HIPAA laws ensures that details regarding my struggles with substance abuse and mental health remain largely concealed. And so, the question remains: why embark on the risky journey of laying bare my past "skeletons" for all to read?
Well, let me explain… I recently began venturing into the realm of Facebook Marketplace to sell various antiques and collectibles which has introduced me to a diverse array of individuals, each with their own unique life stories. A few weeks ago, I conducted a transaction with a gentleman. We negotiated back and forth a bit and eventually came to an agreement on a fair price. After the interaction, he left an encouraging comment in my inbox, urging me to "keep doing what you're doing" in reference to my weekly columns and my past TEDxGoshen talk. He had browsed through some of my Facebook posts regarding my journey with substance abuse and mental health disorders, tuned into my TEDxGoshen talk from this past summer, and even began reading these weekly columns on my website (kream-blog.com) where I share the very narratives you are currently reading (mind you, they are delayed by six weeks).
Now, fast forward to just a few days ago, as he reached out again to acquire another item I had listed for sale. We engaged in similar negotiations, again reaching a fair agreement on a price for the item. At that point, I assumed our conversation would conclude with the completion of the transaction. However, my expectations were pleasantly shattered when he responded with an unexpected message. Here's what he sent...
“I'm going out of my comfort zone but as they say what the hell. Let me know the total and I'll Venmo you the money. And as usual, it was an absolute pleasure doing business with you. You've been a role model for me with my current change in lifestyle that has to do with my diet, weight control, and diabetes management. I am now, over the course of three months, in diabetes remission because of my weight loss and it's not a fad. It is a total commitment to a new lifestyle and reading your story has truly been inspirational, and motivating, and it will continue to motivate me in the future as I take one day at a time making sure I don't stray from my plan. Thankfully day by day I'm getting stronger with this and it's just turning into complete normalcy. Thanks for being so strong yourself and helping me even if it's been at a distance.”
I’ve never crossed paths with this gentleman in the real world and if he were to stand beside me in a grocery store, he would more than likely slip by unnoticed. Yet, his encouraging words have served as a powerful reminder of why I willingly expose the depths of my past. This vulnerability in my weekly columns is not confined to only those grappling with substance abuse or mental health disorders; it extends its relevance to anyone aspiring to initiate positive changes in their lives. This column, while rooted in my personal experiences with substance abuse and mental health struggles, transcends those boundaries. Its insights and principles can resonate with anyone on a journey toward improvement, whether it involves weight loss, smoking cessation, increased physical activity, or any other positive lifestyle transformation. By sharing the intricate events and lessons from my own history, I aim to offer a universal narrative that speaks to the broader spectrum of human challenges and triumphs.
Through the lens of my past, I strive to weave a narrative that resonates with the shared aspirations and obstacles that unite us all. Whether someone is navigating the complexities of addiction, embarking on a fitness journey, or endeavoring to cultivate healthier habits, the underlying principles of resilience, self-discovery, and the pursuit of positive change remain constant. In embracing vulnerability, I aspire to foster a sense of communal understanding and encouragement, illustrating that our collective narratives hold the potential to inspire and uplift each other on the path to personal growth.
In reflecting on this incredible journey of self-disclosure, connection, and unexpected inspiration, I am reminded that the power of sharing one's truth extends far beyond achieving personal catharsis (the process of releasing negative emotions such as grief and anger, thereby relieving the adverse psychological impact of these emotions). The heartfelt message from the gentleman on Facebook Marketplace reinforces the transformative impact that vulnerability can have on others, and it reinforces my purpose of doing what I do. His courage to step out of his comfort zone and share his own journey towards a healthier lifestyle echoes the essence of this column – that our stories, no matter how diverse, possess the universal ability to motivate and uplift. As we navigate the unpredictable terrain of life, each revelation, every shared experience, becomes a stepping-stone toward collective resilience and growth. In embracing vulnerability, we not only illuminate our own path but also illuminate the way for others to find strength, inspiration, and a shared sense of humanity. Together, we can forge a narrative that transcends the boundaries of individual struggles, creating a tapestry of connection and encouragement that binds us in the pursuit of positive lifestyle changes.
And remember, if you’re struggling, or know someone who is struggling, please don’t lose hope. If that had happened to me, I wouldn’t be able to help spread awareness today.
