14. One Day at a Time
Whether you consider yourself to be in recovery from an addiction (you’re in recovery when you say you are), or not, odds are that you have heard the phrase “one day at a time“ used at some point in your life. One Day at a Time (ODAAT) is a mindset, or skill (in my opinion), that is used to encourage people to focus on the present moment, rather than regret the past or worry about the future. It’s a very effective coping mechanism that is used by many addicts, myself included. I personally believe that ODAAT can be applied to and used in anyone’s life, whether they are affected by addiction, or not. For the purposes of this column, I’m going to focus on One Day at a Time being used by an individual with an addiction.
ODAAT is a mindset that has proven to be especially helpful for those who struggle with an addiction. Often when an addict first begins their recovery journey, the thought of staying sober for the rest of their life can seem like an enormous task, and in many ways it is. The recovery process can be rigorous, tedious at times and it requires a lot of work on behalf of the addict. This can be extremely overwhelming. I sure thought it was when I was first attempting to get clean! ODAAT can be used to help alleviate some of the pressure that comes along with thoughts of having to stay clean for the rest of our life. The mindset requires that an addict try to focus more on the present day (hour, minute, second, etc.) with the hope that those feelings replace any feelings of worrying about the future or regretting the past. The addict should try to recognize, acknowledge and focus on any progress they’ve made that day. Consistent use of ODAAT should ultimately help the addict with being able to live in the present moment. My grandmother once told me, “Worrying is like a rocking chair – it gives you something to do but doesn’t get you anywhere,” and it all makes perfect sense to me now.
Planning for the future is a vital aspect to life and I believe it is necessary if you want to be successful, so, please don’t mistake this as me telling you not to plan (for the future) at all; that is certainly not what I mean. When we let ourselves become completely overwhelmed with planning for the future it becomes unhealthy and may prove to be detrimental to our recovery. The same can be said with regretting the past. It’s all about balance, baby! We must try to balance plans for the future and regrets from the past (as evenly as possible) with living in the present moment. If we are not able to find that healthy balance, our life may seem to be spinning out of control. I don’t know about you, but whenever I feel like life is spinning out of my control, I become extremely anxious, and it often creates intense cravings to use alcohol and drugs. Historically speaking, intense cravings to use alcohol and drugs have left me most vulnerable to relapse. If addicts can effectively find a healthy balance, they may be able to take back control of their lives and not find themselves constantly consumed by worry and stress.
Let’s face it though, life can be extremely stressful and that often causes feelings of anxiety. The addict must learn to deal with this anxiety in a healthy manner, or risk relapse. For most of my life I have struggled dealing with ANY amount of stress. I thought using alcohol and drugs was the ONLY way I could possibly cope with (any) stress. Being able to adapt and successfully use the ODAAT mindset took me time and a lot of practice, but it eventually became something like second nature to me. It’s something that I now use day in and day out of my recovery. As I stated earlier, the ODAAT mindset can be utilized by EVERYBODY, not just addicts alone. So, like the old saying goes, “Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why we call it the present.” Let’s try to live more in the moment and take life ODAAT.
And remember, if you’re struggling, or know someone who is struggling, please don’t lose hope. If that had happened to me, I wouldn’t be able to spread awareness today.
